Mother’s Day Mindset Change

I know I haven’t been a mother for all that many years, but I already had in my mind what I considered the “perfect” Mother’s Day. It would start with a sleep in. (Every good day starts with sleeping in.) I would wake at my leisure and be “surprised” with coffee or chai, courtesy of my husband. He would then offer to take the kids out and I would have some “me time” for the rest of the morning. In the afternoon, we would go out together to a park and play. The kids would be extra obedient and cheerful, and there would be no arguments, power struggles, or other “downers” to dampen the great spirit of the day. The day would end with my kids getting into bed without me even having to remind them once about changing their clothes or brushing their teeth. It would end with me kissing them good night and them saying how happy they are to have me as their mother.

Needless to say, reality was very different. With my husband’s job, he was gone from 4:30 in the morning until past noon. No sleeping in; no leisurely morning. But that didn’t mean the day was not special.

I woke and heard my daughter in the kitchen. She ran to the room and saw that the little guy was waking up.

“Aiden, don’t wake up mommy!” She ran back out. She ran in again and saw that I was awake.

“Mommy, happy Mother’s Day. Where is the hot chocolate kept?”

“We don’t have any left.” Her face fell and her shoulders drooped.

“Is there anything else you like to drink? What kind of juice do you like best?”

“Water is good.” I replied.

Allen started laughing. “Water isn’t juice!” The day had begun.

At breakfast time, Allen ran up to me, “Mommy, here’s your Mother’s Day gift.” He had a huge smile on his face as he stood there. “It’s me!” He added. I gave him a hug and said that’s the best gift ever.

My dad (whom my kids call Paca) offered to take the two older ones to church. I jumped at the offer. They were happy to go, yet I still faced the usual power struggle with one of them just getting them out the door (long-standing issue… “I don’t know what to wear.”)

I put on a video for the little guy and decided to clean. Cleaning in a (somewhat) empty house equals music, which always lifts my spirit. I lined up my favorite songs on my playlist and got to work. Kodak moment? My son, just turned two, began singing along with my all-time favorite song, “Who Am I” by Casting Crowns. He would finish every line, and he’s in tune!!!

Everyone arrived home within ten minutes of each other, and found me still cleaning. There was a shuffle of action and whispers and I was presented with a few gifts for Mother’s Day. All this past week Jessica (and sometimes Allen too) would disappear into (my mom) Maca’s room and the door would be locked for up to an hour at a time.

The result? Well, for one, my initial plan to wait until my daughter is seven or eight to teach her to cross-stitch is no longer valid. Mother's Day gift, a cross-stich "Happy Mother's Day"

Mother's Day gift from Allen, angel earringsAnd my son presented me with angel earrings, which he had also made with Maca. They are beautiful! (The scans can’t do the subject justice; you can’t scan their faces when they gave me the gifts; their smiles and hugs were the best gift of all.)

The day wasn’t perfect. There were a few heated discussions and I had to intervene. There were a couple disappointments. There was a challenging moment or two.

But there were also highlights, such as sitting on the backyard swing in the afternoon, Aiden cuddling up to me after waking up from his nap, telling him a story about a bunny—which he of course converted into a story of his own, about a racing car.

Or Allen running up to me and grabbing my hand at the park, “Come mommy, let’s run down the hill together!”

And, at the end of the day, as I prayed for the night with them, Jessica cuddled up to me and said, “You’re such a cuddly mommy. You’re such a good mommy.”

It wasn’t a perfect day (what parent ever gets a perfect day?), but it was a great day, and I couldn’t ask for more.


About Bonita Jewel

Bonita Jewel is an author and blogger who writes on a variety of themes, including: Literature & poetry Writing Parenting Purpose After living in India from the age of 16 to 28, she returned to California with her husband and three children. She is pursuing a Degree at Fresno State University. Bonita teaches community education at Clovis Adult. Her courses include Blogging Basics, Power Editing, Creative Writing, and Working from Home. She also freelances as an editor, ghostwriter, and writing coach. Her greatest passions are her family, her faith, writing, and reading. Bonita Jewel has been reading since she was 2 ½. Thirty years later, she still loves the magic and mystery of the written word. She is slowly breathing life into roughly 50 novels and nearly as many nonfiction works, depending on which plot or character seizes her interest at any given time. Please connect with Bonita at:

Posted on May 9, 2011, in Special Days and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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